March 1, 2025

Frenemy: Is Perimenopause Our Friend or Enemy?

Because it kinda feels like both.

Remember that lost, weird, confusing feeling you had around age 12 or 13? When your body started doing things that didn’t make any sense? When your skin broke out, your emotions made zero sense, and you randomly cried while watching commercials for dish soap?

Yeah. Welcome back.

Her name is Perimenopause.

Wait… Have We Met Before?

Perimenopause is like puberty’s grown-up, slightly chaotic cousin. She comes in unannounced, throws everything off-balance, and doesn’t care that you just got comfortable in your own skin.

At first, it’s subtle. You just feel different. You can’t explain it, and your doctor probably can’t either—because there’s no clear test for it. Most hormone panels can’t keep up with the daily fluctuations. You’re not imagining it. Your hormones really are dancing to their own weird beat.

And the kicker? The only way to diagnose perimenopause is by symptoms. But those symptoms? They’re like ordering a surprise meal at a restaurant where the menu is written in invisible ink.

Some women get hot flashes.

Some can’t sleep.

Some cry over grocery store lighting.

Some feel rage toward their dryer for being too loud.

Some gain 10 pounds overnight without changing a thing.

(Hi, that’s me.)

The Term Itself Feels Like a Betrayal

Perimenopause.

It sounds clinical.

It sounds like a countdown.

It sounds… like the beginning of the end.

The end of fertility. The end of youth. The end of your "real" body. The media doesn’t help. The way we’re told about perimenopause makes it feel like we’re about to shrivel up and disappear into a puff of dry shampoo and vitamin D.

Estrogen drops. Skin thins.

Bones lose density.

Hair sheds like it's on strike.

Muscle melts.

Weight creeps in—usually around the middle.

You start wondering if your leggings are shrinking in the wash or if your body is just staging a protest.

So… Friend? Enemy? Or Something Else?

Let’s be real. Perimenopause doesn’t feel like a friend.

But is she an enemy? Maybe not.

She’s more like that friend who tells you a hard truth. The one who shows up uninvited, opens your fridge, drinks your wine, and tells you that something needs to change. You didn’t ask for her opinion, but deep down, you know she’s not wrong.

Perimenopause is the body’s way of saying:

“Hey. Time to check in. Things are shifting. You’re not broken—but you do need something different now.”

It’s not the end. It’s just… a reintroduction.

To your body. To your needs. To your limits.

To your power.

So What Should We Do?

Here’s the part where I wish I could give you a clean, clear checklist that solves everything. But perimenopause isn’t one-size-fits-all. No supplement, skincare serum, or influencer-endorsed magic patch will fix it all.

But here’s what I do know:

You’re not alone.

You’re not crazy.

You’re not broken.

And you don’t have to throw your money at every solution that gets pushed at you.

This blog exists because I’ve tried a LOT—some useful, some useless, some ridiculous. My goal is to help you sort the noise from the truth, figure out what actually helps, and do it without going broke or losing your sanity.

Because perimenopause may be unpredictable, but with the right support (and a good laugh), we don’t have to feel lost in it.

Bottom line?

Perimenopause is a frenemy.

She’s confusing. She’s annoying.

But maybe, just maybe… she’s here to teach us something, too.

💬 Got a perimenopause “WTF moment” you want to share? Drop it in the comments or email me. Let’s normalize the weird. 💛

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